unselfish? maybe yes, maybe no...

so today . . . i chose to spend the day with my family instead of going to the gem show by myself.

i am kind of selfish. no, really, i am. i have finally admitted this to myself. i like to have things my way. and much of the time i get to have things my way. but i think this is not a good character trait, so i am trying to change and be less selfish sometimes.

i'm still not very good at it.

rollie is really good at it. he is the reason that i get things my way much of the time. in fact, he is the reason i was even considering going to the gem show today. he knows that by the end of the summer, since i don't get a paycheck when i don't work, i am pinching my pennies. so he handed me some cash and said, "why don't you just go to the gem show this afternoon. you could go all by yourself so you wouldn't have to hurry. you could just take your time and look at all the rocks and have fun!" so that was my plan...

but yesterday he had mentioned going to the movies today. and i knew diandra wanted to go too, so instead of going to the gem show by myself, i went to the movies with my family. we went to the cheap theater to see "knight and day." rollie picked the movie. this gave diandra a reason to say, "uh oh." because every time the two of them go to the movies, and rollie picks it, it turns out to be a terrible movie! half the time, they end up getting up and walking out.

i would just like to say, this never happens when i choose the movie.

rollie says it isn't his fault. he says that when it is just him and diandra, he tries to choose something that i wouldn't enjoy seeing, which severely limits their choices. which i guess technically makes it my fault, but still...

the critics hated this movie--which was good news for us. we frequently love movies the critics hate. (we also frequently love tv shows that get canceled in their first season.) we are not big tom cruise fans but we love cameron diaz. (ok, i like tom cruise, even though i think he is a little bit out there in real life. but i like him in movies--i can't defend it, i just do. diandra does not agree with me. but then, she likes those vampire boys--yeah, explain the appeal of that to me. and we both like cameron diaz. rollie is oddly silent on his movie star preferences...)

so there we were.

we had a great time. it was fun and entertaining. there was romance--sort of. there was intrigue. there were good guys and bad guys--but we weren't always sure which was which. stuff blew up. there were unbelievable car chases. and cameron diaz's eyes shone bluer than blue clear through to the end. yes, it was far-fetched, but it wasn't supposed to be a documentary! it was a movie!! i know there were impossible coincidences and stunts, but i didn't care! it was fun!! i don't go to the movies to feel other people's pain or drama or difficulties--i have enough of my own to deal with. i want to laugh. and hear my family laugh. and have rollie and diandra saying the same thing into my ears at the same time. and high-fiving each other in front of me and behind me. (yes, i was in the middle this time.) i want to eat my hot dog and drink my soda and walk out into the sunshine feeling good! and today i did :)

i sort of thought i would try to go to the gem show after the movie, but it was late enough that traffic was going to be an issue. and diandra wanted me to go with her to get her hair cut. so, still practicing the whole unselfish thing, we went to the mall...

i watched diandra get her hair cut--practically one hair at a time! she just wanted it trimmed, and the hair stylist took her very seriously. i kept looking at the floor to see the results, but the floor looked clean to me. when she got done, i said, "it doesn't look any shorter! if i was paying that much for a haircut, i would want it to look shorter!" "mom!" she replied, "i pay that much for a haircut so that it doesn't look any shorter!!"

ok...

we spent a little time wandering the mall. for the first time EVER i came out of american eagle with a bag and diandra didn't! we braved forever 21, and managed to get in and out without security being alerted. but my american eagle victory was short-lived, as diandra made a second trip in, and came out with, yes, jeans...

i may go to the gem show tomorrow. or i may not. the gem show comes to town several times a year, but days like today are not going to happen forever. families grow and change, and ours will too. but for now, for today, my unselfishness paid off. oddly enough, what started out as an unselfish choice actually ended up paying selfish dividends, because i got to spend the day with two of my favorite people.

and i didn't have to share them :)