so today . . . i had my "procedure" and have lived to tell about it.
there really isn't much to tell, because my doctor mercifully puts me to sleep while she does whatever evil stuff she has to do. my doctor is amazing. i think God must be saving a special place in heaven for gastroenterologists!
i have endured this "procedure" many times, and have found that once i get done with the prep, the rest is easy. i had even made plans for tonight, thinking that i would be feeling fine by then. but i did not. the sedative and i had a battle. and while i ultimately won, the sedative had me on the ropes for most of the day. here's the story . . .
diandra was going to take me in this morning, because rollie thought he might be busy with his parents (who are visiting us,) but diandra woke up sick--really sick--like "i think i might throw up at any minute" sick. so it didn't seem wise for her to take me. as it turned out, rollie was able to take me, and then meet up with his parents later. but that change meant that we left a little later than i had planned. so we decided to take the freeway. at 8:50 in the morning! it turned out not to be a good choice--how many different ways can we say parking lot?!?! so we got ON the freeway, and then about a quarter of a mile later we got OFF the freeway and took surface streets. and we made it just in time . . .
they wheeled me into the 'cave of doom,' put me blissfully out, and the next thing i knew, a nurse was yelling at me, "julie! open your eyes!!!" and she continued this until i finally did--for about 10 seconds. they made me sit up, and yet i slept. they tried to get me on my feet, but my legs were taking a break as well and would not hold me up. they had rollie come in and get me dressed,which was probably like trying to put clothes on a giant 105 pound rag doll!! apparently i could follow directions, but could NOT open my eyes. my legs were still acting like spaghetti noodles, so they put me in a wheelchair and rolled me out to the car. i remember getting in and getting out, but nothing in between. it reminded me of when killers are abducting someone they have drugged in order to kidnap them. i was glad to be kidnapped as long as no one tried to make me open my eyes. about two hours later, i woke up on my bed. i finally got my eyes to open, but they were not very happy about it.
you would think i would be famished and make an immediate dash to the kitchen. but for the first time in the last two days, i didn't really feel hungry. i knew i needed food, so i ate a piece of toast--not at all what i had spent the last two days planning to eat for my first meal after the "procedure," (i was thinking pizza and brownies!) but it seemed to be a good choice.
as i said, diandra wasn't feeling good either, and we were both feeling the need for pepsi one, but diandra (who i love dearly--except for maybe when she drinks the LAST pepsi one,) drank the last pepsi one yesterday. so there we were alone (rollie took his parents out for a bit--i mean, here they are on vacation to visit us, and i feel sick and can't eat, so i'm not very entertaining right now,) with no soda and neither of us feeling able to drive to the store, secure a box of pepsi one, and make it home safely with all of our stomach contents intact. we were sitting there looking at each other, and when diandra said, "javier said he would bring me some vitamin c."
"do you think he would bring us pepsi one instead?" i ask.
"probably," she says.
"THEN CALL HIM!" i say.
twenty minutes later he is at our door with pepsi one--if he were a woman, we would "rise up and call him blessed (prov. 31) but since he is not, we just say thankyou!thankyou!!thankyou!!! and immediately begin guzzling.
which is wonderful--for about 45 minutes. i had started feeling better, and thought that maybe we could go ahead with our plans for tonight after all . . . when suddenly, i feel sick. sick. sick. i have to head back to bed, and for the next hour and a half, i think death would be a step up . . .
my stomach seems to have settled down now, and my headache and nausea are mostly gone. i think maybe i could eat a hot dog--if my eyes would just stop watering and my nose would stop running. so now i am thinking that i managed to make it through my "procedure" in one piece, only to catch the swine flu?!?!?