Tuesday, November 10, 2009

co-dependant

so today . . . i need a diet soda. really. i NEED one.

i drink a lot of soda. i just like it. i know it isn't good for me, but i love it. it is my one vice. well, if you don't count 7-11 brownies.

lately i have decided i should cut down on the amount i drink. my doctor thinks it is a good idea. my husband thinks it is a good idea. but most importantly, my mother thinks it is a good idea.

i love my mom. she is great. she is always looking out for me. she doesn't nag or interfere, she just informs. when i started driving and was able to go places alone, she would refer me to newspaper articles (yes, in the days when we had to read newspapers, because there was no internet) about car jackings or abductions from shopping mall parking lots. her intent was not to scare me into staying home--i don't think--but just to make sure i knew there were dangers out there and i should be careful. and it worked. when i am out alone after dark, my eyes are constantly darting back and forth, in a surreptitious way, looking for the evil that might be lurking. i have even been know to call someone on my way to my car, in especially scary situations, just so that if i do get abducted at least someone will know and can call the police.

now i live 1000 miles away from my mom, but thankfully we have the internet. most nights you can find us both on facebook, chatting while we farm or play with our virtual pets. but she still sends me those cautionary articles through email. i can't tell you how many times i have received the one about the guy at the convenience store/gas station who runs up to your car with a $5 bill to get you to open your window . . . but it is a good thing she sends me these reminders, because after a while i tend to forget. and i do spend a lot of time in convenience store/gas station parking lots--i have to if i want brownies and diet lemon cokesi.

recently she told me about an article she had read online about the dangers of drinking too much soda. this came right on the heels of rollie deciding he would limit himself to one a day, for health reasons. so it got me to thinking that maybe i should cut back too . . .

this all occurred, coincidentally, on the weekend that we happened to run out of pepsi one. usually when this happens, i immediately run to the store for more. but this time i thought, no, let's not keep cans of soda around. maybe if it isn't in the house i will only drink it when we eat out (which is still quite often) and that will help me cut back.

it seemed like a good plan. and it was, until the soda i brought home from lunch was gone.

i thought that if i had to get into my car and drive some place to buy a soda, i would be less likely to do it, and so i would drink less. apparently that is not true.

it has been almost a week since i made this momentous decision about not keeping cans of soda in the house, and the people at jack-in-the-box are starting to ring up my order for a large diet soda before i even get to the cash register! seriously.

rollie is doing quite well with this new change. but then we all know that he is the disciplined one. diandra and i--well let's just say that we enable each other. i cannot tell you how many trips one or the other of us has made to the nearest fast food place to get sodas. whichever one of us is home will text the one who is out, saying something like, "i could really use a soda. could you pick one up for me on your way home?" and of course, whoever is going through the drive-thru at chick-fil-a is also going to get one for themselves. so i am not sure we are drinking any less soda. we are just paying more for it.

and thinking about it all the time. i am sitting here tonight, parched. i could drink water, but i don't like water. i wish i did. i was reading a new blog today where someone listed water as their favorite drink. i was so jealous!! all i want is a soda. i checked the refrigerator, twice, just in case one was stashed in there in the back, hidden accidentally. i looked in the garage, because sometimes i keep a 2 liter bottle out there for emergencies. i think i am starting to identify with people who have addictions.

this would be easier if it were cold here. then i could drink hot tea, or even hot water--which strangely, i like. but it was 80 degrees today! in november!! i'm sorry, but that is not hot drink weather. that is tall-frosty-glass-of-something-with-caffeine-splenda-and-bubbles-in-it-that-you-drink-through-a-straw weather.

tonight i have no soda. i do not feel up to making the trip out to get one. diandra would bring me one, but she will be home late. i guess i will just go to bed. i don't know what i will do tomorrow morning . . .

maybe it will be cold. if it isn't, i think a 12 pack of pepsi-one may find a new home.

4 comments:

Diandra Ann said...

FINALLY!!! I had no idea this is why there was no pop in the house! I just knew I did not like it and yet I never seemed to remember to get any until I was home. If you do not put an end to this then I WILL! :) But good luck with that one a day thing.

Carroll said...

Not just your mother is concerned for your health Julie. I worry about it all the time. Not that it does any good but it sounds like maybe a glint of a good idea about the reduction of soda in your diet is about to take effect.
Take care!

Mom said...

Try cranberry juice. You can get the light kind. Same calories and good for you. Instead of getting more soda for Bunco, I dragged out the dregs of soda left here last summer by you and Diandra. Result: Out of 12 friends, 2 cans were drank. No lesson here I guess, just info. Keep trying to cut back. Your right, this is about addiction so the less you drink, the less the craving. Now you understand food and all other kinds of addictions. Dr. Oz says when the craving hits you, go for a walk. it will go away. Kills the addition fast, especially if you don't like to walk.....hehehe

Jewelielyn said...

mom!! the evil laugh?!? AGAIN??? we've created a monster . . .