so today . . . my alarm did not go off.
this was a problem, because i go to church on sunday. not only that, but i have to rehearse the band before church, so i need to be there by 9:00. this morning when i turned over and blearily opened my eyes to squint at my clock, it said 8:39! did you see that i am supposed to be at church by 9:00?!?!?!
the good news is that it wasn't really 8:39--it was really 8:19. my clock is always set to the wrong time. on purpose. i am not a morning person. i am one of those people who hits my snooze alarm 4 or 5 times before i am actually able to drag myself into an upright position. i have found that if my clock is set ahead a few minutes, it helps me to be on time. but it has to be set ahead by a prime number of minutes--usually i choose 13. this is because my brain knows that my clock is set ahead, but in the blurriness of my mornings, it cannot calculate the actual time if it is set ahead 7 or 13 or 19 minutes. and that is ok, because i'm trying to fool myself into getting up earlier since i think it is later than it really is. even though i know it really isn't. are you following me here?
this drives my poor husband crazy! it is compounded by the fact that my clock projects it's time onto the ceiling. once i go to sleep, i am pretty much out for the night. he is not. and when he wakes up he sees the time on the ceiling. of course, he knows it is not the real time, but he is never quite sure how far ahead it is. plus, my clock tends to pick up a minute here and a minute there, so usually even i am not sure of the exact discrepancy. so he lays there, doing the math in his head (why is it harder to subtract prime numbers?) which engages his mind, and then he has a harder time going back to sleep. i have suggested he just turn over and look at his own clock, which has the exact right time on it. but he says he can't ignore the gigantic blue numbers from my clock, announcing to anyone who cares to look, the wrong time . . .
he has, however, finally resigned himself to the fact that i have to smack the snooze alarm several times before i get up. he doesn't understand it at all, but he has accepted that the alarm has to go off repeatedly before i can wake up. usually this is not a problem for him, because he is up and out the door before my eyes even begin struggling to focus . . .
i married a morning person. he is always up and finished exercising (yes, he gets up and lifts weights in the morning--at least he SAYS that is what he does. i am always asleep, so who knows if he really does that . . . although he is in pretty good shape, and he doesn't lie, so it is probably true . . . ) and out of the shower and dressed, before i actually stumble out of bed. this is probably one of the reasons we have been married so long--our paths do not cross in the morning until i have showered and dressed and am headed out the door.
but this morning, none of that helped me. and actually, my alarm did go off. it's just that it was the alarm on my phone, and last night i had turned the volume off. i turned the volume off, because rollie was already asleep, and when i plug my phone in it makes a beep beep sound. so my plan was to turn it off, plug it in, and then turn it back on. it was a good plan, but clearly lacking in execution. so it tried to wake me up, but it couldn't make any noise. when i saw the time "8:39" on my clock, i leaped out of bed and raced toward the bathroom and soap and water.
while i was washing my face, i was wondering why diandra hadn't come in to see why i wasn't up. we had discussed riding together this morning. surely she had been aware of the silence from my room--no hair dryer, no music blasting from the ipod, no "good morning" from her mom. and then i noticed she looked like she was just getting up too. diandra also has to be at the church by 9:00. her alarm did not go off either. it was also set on her phone, but it had failed for a different reason than mine. so there we were . . .
i don't think we have ever gotten ready for church faster than we did this morning! i was out the door before my brain was even really in gear. i didn't even look at myself in the mirror before i left the house.
we were late, but only by a few minutes. i started band rehearsal. and can i just say right here that my blog yesterday was proven over and over and over again this morning during rehearsal. i cannot tell you how often those boys said something totally unrelated to what we were doing. and it made me laugh, because it just proved the truth of what i had written yesterday. but i was the only one who could enjoy it, because no one else had read my blog yet. and i kept laughing, and the boys kept saying, "what? what?" it was hysterical . . .
what was not so hysterical was what happened later. we are celebrating our anniversary later this month, so our church decided to acknowlege that today by giving us a gift. this required me to go up and stand on the platform next to rollie for a few minutes to accept it.
nonononononono, my brain said. no. the problem was a--i got up late, b--i had thrown on my skinny jeans and a top and had no idea what i looked like, c--my hair was in a ponytail, and d--i am never in the main service, and this was probably not the best way for people to realize that the person married to their pastor had come to church looking like a teenager today!!! it was not my finest hour.
but thankfully, time does move on--even if you are not really sure what time it is . . .