Wednesday, February 3, 2010

"mr demille? i'm ready for my close-up now."

so today . . . i am debating the merits of becoming famous.

i've been blogging for over a year now. i think i am beyond the phase of "i would blog even if nobody read it." seriously over it. because, as i've mentioned more than once, it takes a lot of time and thought to write a really good blog--at least it does for me! so i am at a crossroads . . . should i become famous or continue to write in relative anonymity?

i do have 15 followers already. although the truth is, for some reason rollie is listed twice and so is diandra--so i really only have 13 followers. and i am not so sure that they all still read my blog, since i do not regularly get comments (or even reactions) from 13 people. i think some of them must have found me linked from somewhere else (probably diandra's blog, because she IS becoming kind of famous,) read a blog that made them laugh and decided to follow it, but then read one of my whiny blogs and decided they had better things to do with their time. so realistically probably only five or six people regularly read right now.

but i think that could change. there are all kinds of ways to boost readership. i could join a group like blogher, which is a community of women who blog. if i joined, probably some of those women would start reading my blog, which would boost readership. but then, i would have to read their blogs too, because it would be the nice thing to do. and then they would comment on my blog and i would comment on their blogs, and before you know it, i would have all these new friends! and friends take time and effort--even internet friends. i don't think i have the time and energy for more friends . . .

or i could start commenting on random blogs. this only works though, if my comments are interesting enough that when people read them they think, "hey, she is funny. i should go check out her blog." and so not only do i have to craft a comment that will grab people's attention, but the pressure is also on to write an exceptionally good blog before i go scattering comments around. because when they come to my blog, i want them to come back. and you know, some days i am cranky, and it shows . . .

or i could volunteer to guest blog for bloggers who are going on vacation or into the hospital or whose electricity goes out because of an ice storm. there has to be a demand for this! blog readers are a fickle bunch and tend to lose interest quickly. it is not a good idea to leave your blog unattended for very many days or your loyal followers will go find someone else to follow. i think i can pretty much blog about anything, so it wouldn't matter if it was a photography blog, or a new mom's blog, or a car collector's blog. (although, if it was a computer nerd's blog, i would have to say no--my computer knowledge could fit on the head of a pin.) but i don't know how many people would accept my generous offer . . .

then again, becoming famous might create some problems. like, for example, if hundreds (or, dare i say it--thousands) of people are reading my blog, it might be hard not to offend anyone. because you know, i do have snarky thoughts sometimes--i just try to keep them out of my blogs. but it isn't always easy. like today--i was sitting in chick-fil-a eating my lunch, and a woman walked in. and when i looked at her, a blog almost wrote itself in my head right then and there--but the snarky rating was high. she was wearing a cute skirt and sweater and flat shoes and bare legs! now, i get the whole bare leg thing in the summer (and see, here i am offending my own mother, who i know reads my blog. sorry mom!) but in february?!?! even in southern california with the sun shining warmly enough that i can drive my car with the top down, she still needed tights! (there were other extenuating factors that screamed out for tights as well, but in the interests of not offending anyone else, i will not mention them. i could, if i was sure that just the six or seven people that know and love me were the only ones reading. i am pretty sure that they would think my observations were funny. but with more readers, who knows . . . )

also, if i became famous i would probably have to change the names of everyone i wrote about, just in case there were stalkers. i am already trying to do this when i talk about kids at school this year, and it is making me crazy! i have a system for choosing the fake names, but i can't tell you--just in case you know any of the kids at my school, then you could figure out which little dumplings are saying what.

here's the truth. i want people to read my blog--lots and lots of people. i want them to laugh. i want them to eagerly await my next post. i want them to decide that they don't want to miss a single one and become a follower. i want people to think it is so great that they will recommend it to their friends. and post a link on their facebook page. and then people they haven't seen or talked to in 30 years, but who are their friends on facebook, will come and read it and tell their friends. and post it on their facebook page. and so on and so on and so on--just like the shampoo commercial.

then i will be famous. but don't worry--i'm sure fame won't change me. unless i can figure out a way to get PAID for it . . .

5 comments:

Al said...

did you include me in the "5 or 6" count? because i didnt register, so im not an official "follower"...

Jewelielyn said...

yes al, I included you. I know you like to "fly under the radar," so I don't expect you to expose yourself as a follower :) even though I know you live to read it ;)

mom said...

Maybe just pick a day of the week to blog and everyone knows that day and that is the day they come and read. Or be like mine, I get e-mails frequently saying they are a fan of my blog and I've never written on it. Interesting, huh??

Jewelielyn said...

you are kidding me! You get fan mail on a blog where you've never written anything?!? Sheesh. I need a publicist . . .

Al said...

well, i would register. but im one of the original followers and you have moved around...from myspace to here..

yes, i do live to read it. so post them daily othewise ill have to steal turtle eggs from you.